Wes Kao

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People judge the average of your achievements, not the cumulative

When we want to impress, we often feel the urge to name every single thing we’ve done.

Every skill we have.

Every client we’ve ever worked with.

Anything we’ve attempted.

We think the more we add to the list, the greater our accomplishments will seem.

But more isn’t always better. Sometimes it’s actually worse. Why?

People judge us based on the average of our accomplishments, not the cumulative.

With averages, adding items can actually reduce your overall perceived value.

Focus on highlights only

People have terrible memories and short attention spans.

At a networking event, stick to one or two things that people can distinctly remember about you.

Instead of listing every client you’ve worked with, mention the most famous ones. People will assume the other clients you worked with were just as famous—you just didn’t have enough room to list them.

Talk about how you’ve been an avid skier for 23 years. Don’t mention that you are also a beginner in woodworking.

To be sure, the fact that you’ve been carving woodblocks for the past six months is an interesting conversation topic. You should absolutely mention it if you’re looking to find common ground with others.

But in situations when you want to impress with your accomplishments, leave it out. Focus on the fact that you’ve been doing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu since you were 4 years old, you’ve won championships, and toured the world.

Average: 3-time world champion in Brazilian jiu Jitsu, computer science major, fluent in French

🚫 Cumulative: 3-time world champion in Brazilian jiu Jitsu, computer science major, beginner at watercolor painting, beginner at choir singing, beginner at the trombone

What if you don’t have jaw dropping achievements?

You have more to be proud of than you think. Anything that would be shocking, surprising, or piques curiosity is fair game to include.

Another example: Let’s say you want to talk about customers you work with.

✅ Average: Worked with Nike, Warby Parker, Microsoft

Conclusion: Listed 3 things. All 3 were strong. So 100% strength.

🚫 Cumulative: Worked with Nike, widgetsforcheap.com, Warby Parker, cogsandwidgets.com, Microsoft, morewidgets.co, widgets4u.com

🚫 Conclusion: Listed 7 things. 3 were strong. 42% strong. Some are strong but others sound spammy. Not sure how legit they are.

The exception is if you want to humanize

Famous leaders will often mention what they’re bad at because they want to appear relatable. When a head of state or CEO says they are terrible at physics but love watching YouTube videos about it, it doesn’t diminish their power. It just makes them seem more approachable, and therefore more likable.

The next time you’re debating whether to include one of your accomplishments or hobbies, think about whether adding it would increase your average.